itunes crashes when iphone is connected

How I can recover the songs that have been deleted from my iPhone 3G?
my iphone crashed when connected to my itunes and everything was destroyed. He I took the apple store and one of the guys that fixed for me, I was worried that I had lost all my music, but I said when I logged my phone to my new one should be restarted itunes and my songs should go back to my phone, because I recognize this user. When I got home I plugged in my phone and completely restored all my numbers and stuff, but not my songs. In the itunes on my computer in the section of the iTunes store when I click on my email address which is a document containing all information about me and my purchase history, which lists all my songs. However, I can not click on or play these songs and you can not find anywhere else in my itunes. Does anyone have any idea how I can get these songs in my iTunes library and so again on my phone? Any help or suggestions would be greatly appreciated!
When restoring an iPhone, which restores the factory settings which means you lose absolutely everything there. After that, when you reconnect to iTunes automatically fill your iPhone with all data being stored in iTunes which means that if you not have any music stored in iTunes, no music to put on your iPhone and therefore you have to put it all back.
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